Initial ideas
There is lots of short term gratification in drinking alcohol.
Here is what one person was mentioning:
- It makes me happy
- It numbs me ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychic_numbing ) and allows me to get rid of the pain of losing my husband
- it makes me joyous
- it makes me feel better
- it makes me calm and relaxed
on the other hand
- it makes me fat
- it disturbs the relationship with my kids
- it destroys my health
why I don't kick out the habit yet
- because I don't have the strength
- I don't feel strong enough to say good bye
- it scares me
More core ideas
- Alcohol is my friend
- everyone says I should stop
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Here are some initial conclusions
Gratification and pleasure
This is the first element which is very strong - alcohol does bring pleasure and whole lot of positive effects - It means that alcohol by itself is quite positive - It's a powerful tool to access pleasure, peace and so on - If it wasn't for the side negative physical effects there would be no problem with it - Of course, the negative psychological effects are there as well but those ones were not touched upon yet.
The point though is that with so many positives you need a really good reason to give it up.
Shamanic practice
Alcohol is a shamanic practice in essence, same as smoking or taking other substances. Originally taking some alcohol can be associated with accessing the spirit world, removing inhibitions, etc.
Pressure from family and friends
This is a strong element - Everyone says I should stop - This is why the motivation element is not strong enough yet - it feels that the pressure is outside - The drive to keep drinking is still stronger because of the gratification factors - Pressure from family and friends can as well trigger a competitive response simply to prove to everyone that you decide and you are in charge - So alcohol consumption can be a rebel response aimed at opposing authority and freeing yourself from it
Guilt!
This goes together with pressure from people around - it triggers as well a feeling of lack of power and authority over your own life
Substitution
The real solution is to ad new pleasure and gratification sources - This new sources of energy eventually replace the need for alcohol - substitution is a way more effective strategy than suppression
Suppression tactics
Why suppression tactics are not too effective? because the quest for pleasure and gratification is still there. The desire to experience pleasure is strong! There is nothing wrong with this desire! On the contrary! It is part of human nature! The set of biochemicals triggered in the brain and body feed a certain biological need. It is natural and healthy to respond to that call.
Respect these needs and honor them rather than denying them! It's essential to acknowledge the need to experience pleasure and gratification!
Coaching strategy + Battle plan
This is the next big step to identify clearly!! Right now, I am offered phone coaching as an access point - this step will naturally and powerfully unfold in the sessions.
So far in the coaching strategy we did a few things...
Acknowledge the pleasure and gratification of drinking a glass of wine
Acknowledge and describe exactly the beauty, power and benefits of drinking - we are not denying them - on the contrary, we are validating the drinking experience and accepting it as a beautiful thing.
We are as well clearly describing the side effects.
Describe the side effects and negative impact of drinking
We do that by checking the health impact, mind impact and describing these impacts
Set up a small affordable target and start practicing it
This could mean cutting alcohol by half or drinking only in the evenings, etc.
Access the beauty space, healing energy, grace or bliss, peace
we did that through a very simple hypnotic or meditative experience using a simple breathing technique
Giving up?
After a couple of sessions the person might just give up - This usually happens as soon as new energy starts kicking in - giving up is a client's way to protect themselves from a new energetic input that feels uncomfortable.
bliss, energy, shift, destruction of an addiction are all challenging and often uncomfortable shifts that trigger the brain and body.
the response to this new energetic input can be retreating to the cave of past habits even if those habits are self destructive or addictive.
This is what often happens with diet shifts, training or kicking out a bad or addictive behavior.
What's the best response when someone is giving up? in may case my response s no pressure - that's part of my code of ethics - Is there something else I should be trying, more challenge? to be followed
Alcohol is coping strategy to numb emotional pain or pressure
In other terms it is an escape strategy.
It is a coping strategy.
When we say escape, many people might hear something negative.
That's not what I feel.
It is often a person's best shot at dealing with pressure.
If that person had other possible tactics, maybe they would use them but very often alcohol will be the main coping tactic.
Imagine you come back from work.
Your mind is invaded with worries and anxieties related with professional pressure.
What do you do if you want to relax and stop your mind from racing?
That's when alcohol often comes in.
What if you had traumatic experiences and want to stop feeling the emotional pain.
Again, alcohol will be a possible coping strategy.
Access the spirit world
Alcohol is a shamanic practice in essence.
If you track back the use of alcohol it is a tribal practice that gives you access to the spirit world.
Drinking wine to feel connected
Drinking wine to feel connected. You heard of that one, right?
Let's go and have a drink! This is what people often say when they want to connect or want to get excited.
Wine, beer, coffee! all drug like substances that often aim at the same thing: wanting to feel connected.
The question is does it work?
Of course if works, otherwise people would not use it.
Alcohol to dissolve social inhibitions
Imagine you go to a social event. You are shy. You don't feel comfortable with engaging in conversations.
You drink a couple of glasses of wine, you relax, your light social anxiety dissolves and you start having a good time.
Why not use it?
Am I saying that alcohol is good?
It is neither good or bad by itself.
It depends on how you use it and how much of it you consume.
It is a tactic!
What are the alternatives to alcohol?
You have dozens of alcohol substitution tactics.
For instance you can use a breathing technique to deal with emotional pressure or pain. This breathing technique will be a release approach.
You can connect with people using dance or movement rather than a drink.
Or you can drink a green juice together to feel a deep energetic connection with someone
So what is the coaching strategy?
We now know about some of the dynamics that lead to drinking alcohol.
What's next?
What's the coaching strategy?
That's when alcohol often comes in.
What if you had traumatic experiences and want to stop feeling the emotional pain.
Again, alcohol will be a possible coping strategy.
Access the spirit world
Alcohol is a shamanic practice in essence.
If you track back the use of alcohol it is a tribal practice that gives you access to the spirit world.
Drinking wine to feel connected
Drinking wine to feel connected. You heard of that one, right?
Let's go and have a drink! This is what people often say when they want to connect or want to get excited.
Wine, beer, coffee! all drug like substances that often aim at the same thing: wanting to feel connected.
The question is does it work?
Of course if works, otherwise people would not use it.
Alcohol to dissolve social inhibitions
Imagine you go to a social event. You are shy. You don't feel comfortable with engaging in conversations.
You drink a couple of glasses of wine, you relax, your light social anxiety dissolves and you start having a good time.
Why not use it?
Am I saying that alcohol is good?
It is neither good or bad by itself.
It depends on how you use it and how much of it you consume.
It is a tactic!
What are the alternatives to alcohol?
You have dozens of alcohol substitution tactics.
For instance you can use a breathing technique to deal with emotional pressure or pain. This breathing technique will be a release approach.
You can connect with people using dance or movement rather than a drink.
Or you can drink a green juice together to feel a deep energetic connection with someone
So what is the coaching strategy?
We now know about some of the dynamics that lead to drinking alcohol.
What's next?
What's the coaching strategy?