I just got into a relationship with this great guy, even though he is younger than me, I don't see it as a problem anymore, but I have this fear that he will break up with me, even though I know that he really likes me, and I just want to be able to spend time when its just me and him.
Also his best friend is a girl, and when we all hang out, he always gives her more attention than me, and it makes me feel insecure and that he likes her better, and I asked him and he said that there's nothing between them, that they have been great friends since kindergarten.
I just want to know, how can I know for a fact that he likes me, and not her, and to spend more time together?
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Hi,
How are you today?
Are you in a committed relationship or are you still in the beginning stages?
If you start being clingy, attached or demanding in any way, this can become very big turn off for him.
He apparently tells you that it's with you he wants to be, so the best is simply to trust him. It's with you he decides to be, so take this as an answer. He might like his other friend and it is quite natural to fantasize about someone else every now and then. Nothing wrong with that. Start ringing the bells only when it happens physically.
If you develop a high level of trust very fast, it will make your life and his life much easier. You will relax in the relationship and enjoy it immensely.
Relationships can always end anytime. It is fact and it happens. What you can do is simply be sure that even though you are in a relationship, you maintain a strong individual integrity. Keep your friends and the life you had before meeting him.
Be sure that your personal foundation does not depend on him. You feel stable and secure with or without him. This is one of the keys for long lasting happiness.
If your pleasure in life depends too much on his move, your create this depends which limits your life and freedom.
So learn to develop your own base and be in a relationship at the same time. It is a skill which needs to be learned. Once you have it, you'll notice a big difference in the way you stand in life.
Where to start? Keep an active social life beyond the limits of your relationship. Flirt with other men and keep your seduction skills active. No need to do that in front of your partner, simply feel how other men can give you value as well.
Use terms like "I want...", rather than "What shall we do?...". It's all a matter of balance. When you fall in love, it's like you want to give your life to the other person. That's beautiful, romantic and exciting. Now simply ad a touch of personal power so that you stay in control of your life.
If he needs space simply give him that space. Don't invade him. This will strongly turn him off.
Find this perfect balance and you'll touch on the pure magic and fun of relating.
Enjoy!
Francisco