Not sure if your goal is to help yourself or try to help him. I believe that if you are planning to get your full power back, right now his influence is making it harder on you. Sure, he is in your mind. He is in your past. If you want to look into your future rather than going backwards, you want to ad elements to your life which were not there before.
Look into the future. Look forward rather than trying to get back together something which might have collapsed.
The first step is to get back your full strength and build a new emotional foundation where you feel strong and valued.
You are the center of it. It's in your hands! Break the cycle and go beyond the limits of what you already know with him.