A break up happens on different levels.
The “material” break up is one of them.
Who gets what?
Where do you live?
Are you kicking her out of your house?
Do you have the material resources to live on your own?
All these questions ad to the emotional load.
Suppose that your material base is not threatened.
You have security and enough resources.
What is left is the emotional challenge, right?
The material break up is one key challenge.
In fact it is half of the story.
You want to gain full control over your material base.
You are now a one person’s enterprise and you want full autonomy.
Protect your personal space.
You are in control.
A break up is a transition.
It is okay to stay half way for while.
Secure what you can.
Get rid of what is not yours.
Secure your personal base.
Reshape your administrative body: bills, memberships, credit cards, address, etc.
All these elements are what you call your personal foundation.
Express your power in that area.
How?
By gaining full control over these aspects of your life.
Have control over your time frame, your personal space and your administrative body.
In a break up, this is half of the challenge: recover your full autonomy.
You are now a one person enterprise and you are the master of your ship.
Kick your ex’s will power out of the picture.
Recover your full power and autonomy.
Whatever power she had in the past, take it back from her.
It is your life.
It is your basic human right to be in control of it.
When you are in a relationship, you tend to delegate part of your authority to your partner.
You make concessions, chose together, take decisions for the future, etc.
When she is gone, your will power and authority are the only things which matter.
Gain back full control.
This power recovery is an essential step.
Take it back and use it.
You are fully in charge again.