Chatting with one of her male friend’s is not cheating.
A light flirt is not cheating.
Cheating is not a fantasy, it is an action.
You can’t control someone else’s thoughts.
The real limit has to do with exclusivity in sex and other intimacy aspects.
Is she crossing the line or not?
Cheating is a very specific action.
It involves intimacy.
Now, if you react because your wife did cheat on you, it is probably justified, right?
What are the facts?
Who does she share her life with?
Is it with you or with a men she saw once at a party?
You did catch a glimpse of excitement in her eyes?
There is nothing wrong with that!
Your partner can receive validation from other men without this being a real threat on your relationship.
In fact it is empowering for your couple.
Put it this way:
Even though she has the choice, it is still with you she decides to be.
You win! She wins!